I Eat Chocolate at 3am - Why We Crave and How to Ride the Wave
My story - Hi my name is Gary and I have a sweet tooth:
For as long as I can remember, I’ve had a habit of sneaking out of bed in the middle of the night for chocolate and a glass of cold milk. I don't know why, but waking up and knowing what I’m about to do, gives me pleasure. My old housemate is the only other person I know who would do the same. We called ourselves ‘The Chocolate Werewolves'. Full moon or not, if there was chocolate in the woods, it was going to die.
Why am I sharing this? Because there’s a common belief that coaches and trainers have it all figured out. For me personally, that's bollox. I struggle with cravings just like everyone else.
The problem is when these cravings lead to behaviours that hurt you, you don't believe you can stop, calories add up, and body fat begins to creep in over time.
What's happening in our brains?
Our brains are wired to seek comfort and avoid pain. Dopamine, the pleasure chemical, is triggered by anticipation—not the actual treat. That’s why the urge can feel so powerful, and why it can be tough to break the cycle. Gamblers say - it's not the winning or the losing, it's the buzz of waiting for the outcome.
Dopamine works like a seesaw with pain and pleasure on the seats. Too much pleasure and it will tip towards pain (withdrawal), too much pain and it will tip towards pleasure (think about the feeling you have AFTER you jump in the sea, or AFTER a long run).
So why am I seeking pleasure?
This is a really important question to ask yourself frequently. Chances are you're in temporary emotional pain (boredom, loneliness, responsibility fatigue).
Or is it your environment? In work, are people and tasks causing you enough pain that you need to find pleasure?
How to Manage Your Werewolf:
Ask yourself why you are seeking pleasure: then try to confront the emotions first. Start here, even if you still give in, you are beginning to understand how you operate
Reduce temptations: Set up your environment so it’s harder to give in. For me, no milk in the house, no milk means no chocolate. This is my personal go-to
Pleasure fast: Notice which habits light up your dopamine, and try taking a break
Embrace short-term discomfort: Cold showers, a run or walk in the rain—these planned challenges help reset your reward system and make the next urge easier to manage
Create a positive rule: For example, make it a point to always have birthday cake to celebrate that other person's day, or only have ice cream outdoors with your kids. I personally have the birthday cake rule
Ride the Wave:
Remember the urge is temporary. So is the discomfort of resisting it. Just hold on. Recovering addicts call this "Riding the Wave".
If you approach your habits and behaviours with curiosity and compassion, you’ll find it easier to ride the wave rather than fight against it.
And finally, to all my fellow werewolves out there, this is the first email I’ve sent out, so please feel free to share your feedback and/or questions.
